I don't think there will ever be a good time for me to write my ode to Simba. He died on Oct. 3, 2012 at around 9:30am. I will never forget that horrible day.
He was doing so well the last few months of his life. The swelling around his left eye had gone down significantly and he was pretty active. My fear was the tumor had moved further into his brain and that was why the swelling was down. My fear turned out to be reality.
It was a non eventful Tuesday night. Simba was laying on his twin bed in front of our king sized bed and he was getting ready for another night "sleeping with his mama" :) As soon as I would head for the stairs, he would hurry and follow me up knowing that we were going to bed. It had been months since he'd actually come up on our bed and sleep with us. I think it was just too hot for him but I missed feeling his big body laying up against mine. It was such a comfort having him next to me. I usually sit with him on his bed and pet him for a little bit before I jumped in bed. i can't remember if I really did that on this night. I read my book for a little bit, then put my ear plugs in and fell asleep. It had to be around 10 or 11pm.
The next thing I knew it was like 3 in the morning and I heard Brett yell Oh my God! and felt him jumped out of bed. I flew up and turned on the overhead light and jumped out of bed. What I saw was horrifying. Simba was gasping for breath, foaming at the mouth and seizing uncontrollably. Just seeing him like that and knowing there was nothing I could do to stop it was heart breaking. I just stood there watching Brett hold him and I started to cry. I ran to get my cell phone and called the emergency vet. They were very calm and said that it should only last a few minutes and that he may be really out of it when it's done but if he doesn't stop seizing, we are to get him to the hospital. At that point we had no idea how long he had been seizing but he hadn't stopped since we got up.
We immediately decided we had to rush him to the hospital. The whole way there, Simba never stopped seizing. I was sitting in the backseat with him trying to comfort him. I couldn't believe he was still alive. The stress on his body had to be tremendous. His heart was racing. I'm not a doctor but from what I know about seizures, it's like frying your brain cells. I have no idea if Simba was even aware of what was happening. I just knew that this was not good for an animal to be continously seizing for almost 45 mins straight. Poor guy lost control of his bowels on the way there. That was the least of my worries.
The vet came out and helped us carry Simba inside. He ended up having to give him valium and propofol to stop him from seizing. He was essentially heavily sedated. After about 10 mins he said we could come back and see Simba. He was stable but breathing very hard. The vet said it is as if Simba had just run a marathon. His temperature was 107 (normal is 100-101) so they put cold towels and an ice pack on him to try and bring him body temperature down.
Brett and I sat with Simba for the next 3 hours. During that time, Simba had labored breathing and as soon as he would come out of sedation, he'd start seizing again. His back legs would tense and stick straight out. The vet continued to give him propofol to sedate him. Brett and I just cried our eyes out knowing that we might have to make the worse decision of our lives. We knew that if Simba can't stop seizing when the sedatives wore off, we couldn't see him suffer like that. Plus if he did come out of it, would he even be the same. Then we feared what if he had another seizure when we were at work. Neither of us could live with ourselves if we came home and found him suffering for God knows how long. We would NEVER let that happen.
The vet said he's seen situations like this and felt that it was possible that Simba could recover. He wanted us to take him to our local vet and have him evaluated. We did.
Around 8am, we transported Simba to our local vet. He was given more propofol to ensure he didn't come out of it on our way there. Our vet has taken care of Simba since he was a pup so we trusted his assessment. He said that given Simba's medical situation it wasn't a question of if he will have another seizure, it was when. There were of course anti seizure medicines we could give him but it would just be prolonging the inevitable. Again, I couldn't stop worrying what if it happened when I was at work. I wouldn't want to leave him alone for fear he could seize. It was at this point where Brett and I decided to euthanize Simba. We knew it was the right thing to do.
We did all the rationalizations: He had a long life (average age for a Golden is 10 years, Simba was going on 13), his tumor will continue to progress, he will have more seizures, his quality of life could be severely impaired. There was no question that this was the "right" thing to do but it was the hardest thing to HAVE to do.
Our vet was so compassionate. He said we could stay with Simba as he administers the drug. He gave us all the time we needed to say goodbye to Simba. Wow I knew I would not get through this without crying all over again. Brett and I held onto Simba and cried our eyes out some more. I don't think I have ever cried so hard anytime in my life. Simba was so heavily sedated that he was just laying there on the table. To see him so helpless was heart breaking. To know that in a few short minutes I will never see his panting face again was excruciating. To never see his beautiful when I come home, to never take him to the beach or for car rides. Just to not have him around to make my day was impossible to conceive. To this day I miss him with all my heart. But these were the thoughts going through my head as I held onto him for the last time. He was my baby. I knew him since he was 3 years old and I smothered him with love every day since then. He was such a sweet and beautiful dog. He made our lives so much happier just because he was ours. We knew this day would come and we dreaded it. But it had come and the final moment was upon us.
Neither one of us wanted to call the vet back in because we knew that would be it. We could have spent hours holding onto Simba in that office. But we called him in and he gave Simba another shot of propofol to ensure he was heavily sedated. Then he gave him the final shot and within seconds, Simba's heart stopped. It was so fast. That's when the finality of it all hit. Once again I cried my eyes out and held onto Simba. We stayed there for a little while longer before we finally left. Of course we had to pay our bill first.
I continued to cry on the way home and after we got home. Walking through the door without Simba and knowing we'd never see him again was surreal. I cried so much and so hard that day that I physically felt ill. The pressure in my head was unbearable plus I hadn't slept but it was hard to close my eyes and drift to sleep. I actually had to say the Hail Mary prayer over and over to get my mind to clear. Eventually I did fall asleep.
We still miss Simba every day. It's hard to believe he's not here anymore. It's so quiet in the house. I never realized how much I interacted with Simba. I was either singing to him, talking to him. petting him, feeding him. Now poor Gizmo is left alone. He doesn't elicit the same affections from me as Simba which I feel bad about. Small dogs just aren't the same. I love big dogs and always have.
We will get another golden. One day. We are in a debate on getting a puppy or an older dog. I want a puppy so I can raise it from the beginning but I know they are a lot of work and he'd have to be crated while we are at work. Brett doesn't like having to do that. I know there are a lot of rescue dogs we could get but you never know what they've been through. Who knows. I don't think we're ready for anything yet. There will never be another Simba. So happy we had as much time as we did with him. He will never be forgotten!!
Saturday, December 1, 2012
Saturday, September 1, 2012
Another summer gone
This summer did not disappoint. Sunny and hot pretty much everyday. I couldn't ask for a more Kari-like summer. Like all good things this too must come to an end.
I ran one half marathon with another one coming up next week. Once again I am not prepared for it. I'm debating even participating but I really want the medal! I don't even care how long it takes me to do it. But it's in the city and I really dread the thought of driving. Right now it will depend on the weather and my mood.
The only other event that happened is news that we found out that my Simba has a cancerous tumor in his nasal cavity. Vet said there's really nothing that can be done at this point since it has spread into his brain. The only visible sign that there is something wrong with him is the swelling the tumor has caused around his left eye. It has deformed his eye and he can't see out of it anymore. But he can still see out of the other eye. Prognosis was "grave" with the possibility of living a few months to a year. He is still very active. He is mobile and functioning so I don't think he is suffering. He still eats like a champ, goes to the bathroom, walks up and down the stairs, things that I don't think if he was suffering he'd be able to do. So for now we just continue to give him lots of love and attention and give him pills to try and slow down the progression of the tumor.
I know it's just a matter of time. I know that in my mind but in my heart I don't want that time to come. Every day that I wake up and see that he is awake and looking at me with his mouth open in a pant is a good day. He does pant a lot and even though it's been hot outside, he still pants heavily in a 70 degree house. I think the tumor is making it hard for him to breathe and that is hard to watch. He loves sitting outside now. Before he never wanted to stay out for more than a few minutes but now he wants to constantly go outside. He rolls around and rubs his face in the grass. I think he wants to rub that tumor out of him. The bad thing is, he wants someone out there with him. He will bark continuously until you take him out. He never did that before. But if that makes him happy, then I will do it. I sat outside with him the other day for 2 hours after work waiting for Brett to come home. I treasure the time I have with him.
I pray he continues to live a happy comfortable life and that when that time comes, he passes in his sleep. I tease and announce that I am doing a wellness check when I come home from work looking for him. He always goes upstairs to lay on his bed when we're gone so it's always a little scary to go in the room to see if he's still alive and well. So far everyday I find him he is sitting there panting and looking at me expectantly. I love it. I love him so much and a piece of me will die when he does. He such a great dog and after 12.5 years he's an integral part of my life and my happiness.
There will be another dog, there will always be dogs. I grew up with them and love having them as pets. I love hearing their nails click on the floor. I love the comfort and companionship they give me. I love spoiling them silly. I love taking them for car rides and seeing their heads out the side windows. Seeing the joy that it gives them to go for a car ride. I can totally understand why it means so much to them. They sit home all day waiting for you to come home. Besides seeing us, going for a car ride is the highlight of their day!
I am constantly wrapping my arms around Simba and telling him how much I love him and how he is such a good boy. I know he doesn't understand my words but I'm hoping he can understand my feelings. There will never be another Simba. I will enjoy every minute I have left with him.
I ran one half marathon with another one coming up next week. Once again I am not prepared for it. I'm debating even participating but I really want the medal! I don't even care how long it takes me to do it. But it's in the city and I really dread the thought of driving. Right now it will depend on the weather and my mood.
The only other event that happened is news that we found out that my Simba has a cancerous tumor in his nasal cavity. Vet said there's really nothing that can be done at this point since it has spread into his brain. The only visible sign that there is something wrong with him is the swelling the tumor has caused around his left eye. It has deformed his eye and he can't see out of it anymore. But he can still see out of the other eye. Prognosis was "grave" with the possibility of living a few months to a year. He is still very active. He is mobile and functioning so I don't think he is suffering. He still eats like a champ, goes to the bathroom, walks up and down the stairs, things that I don't think if he was suffering he'd be able to do. So for now we just continue to give him lots of love and attention and give him pills to try and slow down the progression of the tumor.
I know it's just a matter of time. I know that in my mind but in my heart I don't want that time to come. Every day that I wake up and see that he is awake and looking at me with his mouth open in a pant is a good day. He does pant a lot and even though it's been hot outside, he still pants heavily in a 70 degree house. I think the tumor is making it hard for him to breathe and that is hard to watch. He loves sitting outside now. Before he never wanted to stay out for more than a few minutes but now he wants to constantly go outside. He rolls around and rubs his face in the grass. I think he wants to rub that tumor out of him. The bad thing is, he wants someone out there with him. He will bark continuously until you take him out. He never did that before. But if that makes him happy, then I will do it. I sat outside with him the other day for 2 hours after work waiting for Brett to come home. I treasure the time I have with him.
I pray he continues to live a happy comfortable life and that when that time comes, he passes in his sleep. I tease and announce that I am doing a wellness check when I come home from work looking for him. He always goes upstairs to lay on his bed when we're gone so it's always a little scary to go in the room to see if he's still alive and well. So far everyday I find him he is sitting there panting and looking at me expectantly. I love it. I love him so much and a piece of me will die when he does. He such a great dog and after 12.5 years he's an integral part of my life and my happiness.
There will be another dog, there will always be dogs. I grew up with them and love having them as pets. I love hearing their nails click on the floor. I love the comfort and companionship they give me. I love spoiling them silly. I love taking them for car rides and seeing their heads out the side windows. Seeing the joy that it gives them to go for a car ride. I can totally understand why it means so much to them. They sit home all day waiting for you to come home. Besides seeing us, going for a car ride is the highlight of their day!
I am constantly wrapping my arms around Simba and telling him how much I love him and how he is such a good boy. I know he doesn't understand my words but I'm hoping he can understand my feelings. There will never be another Simba. I will enjoy every minute I have left with him.
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
Yay! First day of summer. My favorite time of year. And this year has not been a disappointment. Summer pretty much started in March with 80 degree temps. Today its 95 degrees, sunny, blue sky, hot and breezy. Perfect summer day!
I'm on vacation this week. My first so far this year. I save them up to take during the summer months for reasons stated above. I haven't posted in a while so here's a quick recap of the last few months:
I'm on vacation this week. My first so far this year. I save them up to take during the summer months for reasons stated above. I haven't posted in a while so here's a quick recap of the last few months:
- Work has been crazy. I've been working lots of Saturdays just to try and catch up and it hasn't helped. So I gave my bosses an ultimatum and pretty much said they need to prioritize what needs to get done because I am not working on Saturday's for free anymore. Not in the summer. Sorry.
- I ran my 6th half marathon on June 9th. The Chicago 13.1. It was a very warm day again (not as bad as last year). The race was not called off this year and considering I haven't done any real training for it, I was happy to have completed it in 2:47. Under 3 hours! Considering the heat, my poor conditioning and the fact that I'm about 10 lbs heavier than last year, I didn't do too bad. This is one of my favorite races. Around mile marker 5 you're heading north along the lakefront (Lake Shore Drive) and you see the gorgeous city skyline. Just breath taking. You have the lake which is just gleaming blue with the sun reflecting off of it. Such a pretty sight. Absolutely love love love it!! Grant it, at this point I'm getting tired and realize I am barely half way done but it is still an awesome view.
- Vacation mistake #1 - don't fill the whole week with appointments. I made an eye dr appt, hair appt, and dentist appt this week figuring I have time to get them done. Big mistake. I sat in the eye dr office for about an hour when I was told I may want to reschedule because there is only one dr covering all patients because one of the other dr called in sick. So I figured okay I'll do it tomorrow. I ended up taking Simba to the vet because he's been bleeding from his left nostril the whole weekend and knew that this wasn't normal. Ended up sitting at the vet's office for an hour and cost me $200 for antibiotics and the exam. The next day I go back to the eye dr and sit for over an hour before i'm called back and sit for another 45 mins before the dr gets to me!! I am beyond irritated but figured I'm committed at this point so I just need to wait it out. New contacts and lenses for my glasses costs me $480. Thank goodness for health savings!! Good grief. Then I go all the way to Schaumberg for my hair. I color it to cover the atrocious gray hairs and get a good 4.5 inches cut off and it feels fantastic! Cut, color, and product costs me $300. Two days into my vacation and I've spent close to $1000 and haven't even left the country!!!
- Mistake #2 - always make the effort to look semi decent when going to dr/dentist appt. I just rolled outta bed, threw my hair in a sloppy bun and threw on some raggedy clothes. Two major accidents on the expressway ends up diverting every frickin car in the tri state area to crawl down route 30 so that I'm running late to the dentist. Good thing I was saavy enough to get off the main road and take a back road and manage to get to my appt on time. Find out that my dentist office hired a new "associate". Wouldn't it figure he's a very good looking young guy. F me. I realized that having a good looking dentist is like having a good looking gyny. You don't want them seeing you in an awkward state and sitting with your mouth open and his fingers in it is pretty damn awkward LOL. Come to find out, he's the nephew of a guy I work with. Small world. Good thing I majorly brushed my teeth and tongue before that encounter!
- Mistake #3 - checking work email. It's been 2 1/2 days and my in box had 126 messages. Took a good 2 hours to sort through them and answer some. Not fun but I know it will save me hours of work come Monday.
Saturday, March 17, 2012
This is insane!
We have had over a week of close to 80 and 80+ degree temps and it's only the middle of March! I was out shopping at Kohl's the other night and it was a balmy 75 degrees at 9pm. Let me just say that I am absolutely loving it. Seriously I've never seen a warm streak last this long this early in the year. It feels like summer.
I thought we were lucky when it was pushing 70 for a few days. Now I am totally spoiled. I know the bottom will drop out soon. It's suppose to drop back down to the 60's then 50's by the end of next week. I can't complain (but I know I will) LOL.
I had been running every single day since last Friday because it's been so frickin beautiful outside and I've been telling myself that as soon as the weather got warmer I was going to be running my ass off (literally). But I had to finally take 1 day off on Thursday because my body was exhausted.
But not today. It's sunny right now and around 60 degrees with a forecast of 80. I will be outside every day for as long as this lasts! I just can't believe some people are taking this gift for granted. I just want to scream!! Everyone around here knows that this is a rarity. We're experiencing Arizona weather. Take THAT Arizona :)
I thought we were lucky when it was pushing 70 for a few days. Now I am totally spoiled. I know the bottom will drop out soon. It's suppose to drop back down to the 60's then 50's by the end of next week. I can't complain (but I know I will) LOL.
I had been running every single day since last Friday because it's been so frickin beautiful outside and I've been telling myself that as soon as the weather got warmer I was going to be running my ass off (literally). But I had to finally take 1 day off on Thursday because my body was exhausted.
But not today. It's sunny right now and around 60 degrees with a forecast of 80. I will be outside every day for as long as this lasts! I just can't believe some people are taking this gift for granted. I just want to scream!! Everyone around here knows that this is a rarity. We're experiencing Arizona weather. Take THAT Arizona :)
Saturday, March 3, 2012
It's March!
We are entering the 3rd month of the year already. Really? Seriously where does the time go. It has been the warmest winter I ever remember but I am still looking forward to spring. My fear is Mother Nature getting revenge and we have a cool/cold spring and summer. But I can't worry about things I can't control.
I've really slacked off on running the last few months. I probably only run once or twice a week. I've been doing interval training to try and change things up when I run on the treadmill. But the lack of running has definitely added some LB's in noticeable places. My so called fat pants have become the only pants that fit right now (comfortably) and to add insult to injury, I popped the inside button off of both of them! That's not good.
I have been doing more p90x which has been good. I am seriously lacking in the muscle department and seeing the fat swinging from where my biceps should be is a little unsettling. I keep telling myself that once it gets warmer I will be back out there running every day. As long as my knees hold up. I keep joking that I won't be able to walk when I'm 60 but it very well may happen.
I signed up for a dirty girl mud run in June. It's a 5k with an obstacle course. I've never done one of these only because I'm not sure if I have the stamina to do obstacles, especially with my knees. It's not timed and only women can participate so if anything it will be for fun. There's about 15 girls on our team so it will be interesting.
My first half marathon of the year is in June so hopefully I will be ready for it. I haven't done more than 5 miles since last fall so getting back up to 13 is going to be a challenge. I've done 5 races so far so I know I can do it again. It at least gives me a goal.
There are light snow flurries coming down right now and it's about 20 degrees. There was a day last week where it was 60 degrees but 30 mph gusty winds. It's so easy to be lazy during this time of year. I could so cuddle up in bed and read my kindle.
But there is a light at the end of the tunnel. The other day I was walking the dogs and saw tulips sprouting in our neighbors yard! And somebody told me that the robins have come back and they wouldn't migrate back to the north unless warmer weather is coming soon. Who can you trust if you can't trust nature!
I've really slacked off on running the last few months. I probably only run once or twice a week. I've been doing interval training to try and change things up when I run on the treadmill. But the lack of running has definitely added some LB's in noticeable places. My so called fat pants have become the only pants that fit right now (comfortably) and to add insult to injury, I popped the inside button off of both of them! That's not good.
I have been doing more p90x which has been good. I am seriously lacking in the muscle department and seeing the fat swinging from where my biceps should be is a little unsettling. I keep telling myself that once it gets warmer I will be back out there running every day. As long as my knees hold up. I keep joking that I won't be able to walk when I'm 60 but it very well may happen.
I signed up for a dirty girl mud run in June. It's a 5k with an obstacle course. I've never done one of these only because I'm not sure if I have the stamina to do obstacles, especially with my knees. It's not timed and only women can participate so if anything it will be for fun. There's about 15 girls on our team so it will be interesting.
My first half marathon of the year is in June so hopefully I will be ready for it. I haven't done more than 5 miles since last fall so getting back up to 13 is going to be a challenge. I've done 5 races so far so I know I can do it again. It at least gives me a goal.
There are light snow flurries coming down right now and it's about 20 degrees. There was a day last week where it was 60 degrees but 30 mph gusty winds. It's so easy to be lazy during this time of year. I could so cuddle up in bed and read my kindle.
But there is a light at the end of the tunnel. The other day I was walking the dogs and saw tulips sprouting in our neighbors yard! And somebody told me that the robins have come back and they wouldn't migrate back to the north unless warmer weather is coming soon. Who can you trust if you can't trust nature!
Monday, January 16, 2012
Running outside...during winter
Never say never. Really it's true. I was a firm believer that I would never run outside if it's under 60 degrees until the winter of 2011-2012 came along. I ran outside around Christmas a few times, I ran outside last Saturday, last Tuesday and now today. Don't get me wrong, I've only been out because it's been above 40 on those days. I still stand by my edict that I will never run outside when it's below freezing.
This has been the best winter that I can remember. We've barely gotten any snow (I think it was only 1.8 inches through Jan 10th). Then last Thursday we finally got hit with about 4-5 inches. Nothing out of the ordinary but I would have been more than happy to never see the white stuff at all this winter. Today was around 43 degrees with a south wind which wasn't unbearable. I do not have the proper gear to really be running in the winter so I took it easy in areas where snow still covered the sidewalks. Even though it's well above freezing I didn't want to risk slipping and breaking an ankle.
Forecast calls for more snow tomorrow so I totally enjoyed every minute of being out there today. There's nothing like running outside. I'm really hating the treadmill now. I cannot run non stop on a treadmill for 5 miles. It's almost like torture. I end up stopping at least 4 or 5 times out of boredom. BUT I will continue to use it because I've discovered that I gained 10 lbs since this summer.
I noticed it gradually creeping up when I'd weigh myself. I'd say I'm up a few lbs because it's the TOM, or I haven't gone to the bathroom in a while or the scale is wrong. I eventually stopped kidding myself. I haven't been running nearly as much as I did during the summer and naturally I haven't cut back on my eating.
So my goal (not resolution because I don't do resolutions) is to lose 20 lbs this year, preferably before summer. I need to lose the 10 I regained plus another 10 that I've been wanting to lose for over a year. I dread having to watch what I eat and obsess over calorie counting but that's what I have to do.
I was proud of myself last week. I had a bowl of soup and an ounce of sunchips for lunch and a chicken breast and brown rice for dinner. I did that for 3 days straight and felt really good. Then Friday came and I pigged out on pizza. I'm not calling it a failure, I am just going to pick up where I left off starting tomorrow :)
I also need to start doing more weight training during these winter months. I dread the soreness but I know that in the end I need to do it. I hope the rest of the winter is as mild as it has been. I still look so very forward to spring!
This has been the best winter that I can remember. We've barely gotten any snow (I think it was only 1.8 inches through Jan 10th). Then last Thursday we finally got hit with about 4-5 inches. Nothing out of the ordinary but I would have been more than happy to never see the white stuff at all this winter. Today was around 43 degrees with a south wind which wasn't unbearable. I do not have the proper gear to really be running in the winter so I took it easy in areas where snow still covered the sidewalks. Even though it's well above freezing I didn't want to risk slipping and breaking an ankle.
Forecast calls for more snow tomorrow so I totally enjoyed every minute of being out there today. There's nothing like running outside. I'm really hating the treadmill now. I cannot run non stop on a treadmill for 5 miles. It's almost like torture. I end up stopping at least 4 or 5 times out of boredom. BUT I will continue to use it because I've discovered that I gained 10 lbs since this summer.
I noticed it gradually creeping up when I'd weigh myself. I'd say I'm up a few lbs because it's the TOM, or I haven't gone to the bathroom in a while or the scale is wrong. I eventually stopped kidding myself. I haven't been running nearly as much as I did during the summer and naturally I haven't cut back on my eating.
So my goal (not resolution because I don't do resolutions) is to lose 20 lbs this year, preferably before summer. I need to lose the 10 I regained plus another 10 that I've been wanting to lose for over a year. I dread having to watch what I eat and obsess over calorie counting but that's what I have to do.
I was proud of myself last week. I had a bowl of soup and an ounce of sunchips for lunch and a chicken breast and brown rice for dinner. I did that for 3 days straight and felt really good. Then Friday came and I pigged out on pizza. I'm not calling it a failure, I am just going to pick up where I left off starting tomorrow :)
I also need to start doing more weight training during these winter months. I dread the soreness but I know that in the end I need to do it. I hope the rest of the winter is as mild as it has been. I still look so very forward to spring!
Sunday, November 6, 2011
So far, so good
I have to admit, this fall has actually been like fall weather should be. I've come to really dread running on the treadmill so whereas I use to think 50 degrees was too cold to run, now I'm bundling up and running outside just to avoid the treadmill.
One good thing I did find out though was that ever since I got a new modem, the signal doesn't go out when I'm on the treadmill. I am happy about that since I have like a 100 shows on my dvr that I can't seem to get to. I did start watching Mad Men. I bought the 1st season when I thought I still had modem issues and turns out to be a pretty good show. Its been out for a while now so I guess I'm late to the party.
I've been feeling out of sorts lately. I've struggled to get motivated to run and because I know I haven't been running as much, I'm stressing about how much I've been eating. I feel like I need a break from the workouts but can't bring myself to cut back on the eating. Not that I eat nonstop, it's just that I like not having to really watch what I eat when I'm working out all the time. I told my coworker that I think I'm just gonna sit on my ass this winter and get fat. She's like no you won't, you've worked way to hard to get where you are. I know she's right. It would just be nice to kick back, relax and not gain a pound over the next 5 months. Oh well, one can wish.
It's suppose to be about 60 degrees today but super windy...of course. We can't get a warm day around here without 30 mph south winds to accompany it. I'm hoping to get some energy today and enjoy the weather. It's not all that sunny but hey, I guess you can't have everything!
I'm trying to keep a positive attitude about the upcoming months. It will give me time to get back into doing p90x and working on weight training. I desperately need it. The arm flab is not appealing, neither is the belly fat. Even though I run a lot, I can't seem to get rid of some problem areas. Good thing I am fully clothed 99% of the day - lol.
Well off to church. I am always thankful to have my health and to be alive!
One good thing I did find out though was that ever since I got a new modem, the signal doesn't go out when I'm on the treadmill. I am happy about that since I have like a 100 shows on my dvr that I can't seem to get to. I did start watching Mad Men. I bought the 1st season when I thought I still had modem issues and turns out to be a pretty good show. Its been out for a while now so I guess I'm late to the party.
I've been feeling out of sorts lately. I've struggled to get motivated to run and because I know I haven't been running as much, I'm stressing about how much I've been eating. I feel like I need a break from the workouts but can't bring myself to cut back on the eating. Not that I eat nonstop, it's just that I like not having to really watch what I eat when I'm working out all the time. I told my coworker that I think I'm just gonna sit on my ass this winter and get fat. She's like no you won't, you've worked way to hard to get where you are. I know she's right. It would just be nice to kick back, relax and not gain a pound over the next 5 months. Oh well, one can wish.
It's suppose to be about 60 degrees today but super windy...of course. We can't get a warm day around here without 30 mph south winds to accompany it. I'm hoping to get some energy today and enjoy the weather. It's not all that sunny but hey, I guess you can't have everything!
I'm trying to keep a positive attitude about the upcoming months. It will give me time to get back into doing p90x and working on weight training. I desperately need it. The arm flab is not appealing, neither is the belly fat. Even though I run a lot, I can't seem to get rid of some problem areas. Good thing I am fully clothed 99% of the day - lol.
Well off to church. I am always thankful to have my health and to be alive!
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