July 12 - Monday - finishing up week 7

So I ended week 7 with a bang and not a good bang. I pigged out yesterday!! I knew all week long that we were going on Carrabbas on Sunday for dinner because I had a $50 gift card burning a hole in my wallet. It's one of my favorite restaurants and I knew I was going to be bad. But not as bad as I ended up being!

Somehow the task of eating got away from me yesterday. Now when I was on a carb heavy diet, it was nearly impossible for me to go more than 3 or 4 hrs without eating or I felt like I would faint. So I had my protein cereal around 8:30, then jogged 3.6 miles, then immediately went over to Allison's house for a couple of hours of soaking up the sun in her pool, then ran back over to Brett's house to jump in the shower and leave for a movie. We get to the movies around 3 and I was totally up for a little snack (but not too much knowing what was waiting for me for dinner) but this movie theater did not have pretzel bites. So I decided to wait until dinner. By the time we get to Carrabbas, it was almost 6 pm and I was ravished. This is soo bad for so many reasons. My main concern was that I now put my body in starvation mode so all this good food I'm about to eat is probably going to go straight into fat storing mode.

At this point, I did not care, which is another reason not to go this long without eating. So as soon as the awesome tasting loaf of bread and herbs and oil comes out, I'm digging in. The slices are small but I did have 3 of them. Then came the two apps that we ordered. I had one mini skewer of caprese which is sliced up grape tomatoes, chesse and pesto sauce. Then a meatball. Then my chicken soup. Then my main meal which was the best tasting 4 cheese pizza with italian sausage. It's on this thin crispy dough and I ate 4 out of the 8 pieces. I could have eaten all of it but I was going to get dessert!!! They have this awesome chocolate brownie type dessert and at this point, I'm going all out. In the past I may have eaten 3 or 4 bites and Brett would eat the rest. This time, I think I ate most of it. All I know is that the plate was pretty much licked clean.

When all was said and done, I felt like I was about to explode and of course I felt super guilty. I couldn't even justify it by saying that it was pretty much my only meal of the day. But it was D-E-L-I-C-I-O-U-S!! Every single bite was awesome. So in the end, yes, I blew my diet to shreds but it was worth it. It scares me a little because I can see how easily it would be to fall off the wagon and onto the fat farm. I just keep on thinking about how far I've come and how exciting it is to finally start fitting into my "skinny" clothes again (I tried on my size 12 white jeans on Sunday and they fit, albeit a little snug but I was able to button them and wore them out!! Most women know that white clothing is the most unforgiving, there's no way to hide those rolls or dimples like you can with black clothing). It's those accomplishments that keep me in this til the end!

I'm hopeful but slightly terrified of tomorrow's weigh in....